Cancer What the Hey?

I’ve been in tons of cancer/oncology waiting rooms.  In every case, I was accompanying someone else.  That someone else was always the patient.  Until today.

The Cancer Center at the University of Maryland Medical Center is huge.  I mean HUGE.  And the place is pretty impressive.  They have this huge massive waiting room that has all the creature comforts of home – huge flat screens, internet docking stations, cell phone charging stations, couches, a refreshment counter…I was impressed.  Of course, there are constant reminders around you that despite it looking like a large hotel lobby, it is in fact, a hospital.  Like all the doctors and nurses and handwashing stations.

So, they called me back and I met with the nurse practitioner.  She went over my medical history (and needed an extra sheet of paper) and my symptoms.  Then she went over what sparked this whole thing (my back pain with the stray cyst on my ovary).  By then I had been in there an hour, and had been out of the house for two hours, and had a large cup of coffee in me, and I was doing the peepee dance in my seat.  She told me then the doctor would be in, and to get dressed from the waist down.  That’s when I asked to use the rest room, and she said sure.

So, when I got back to the room, I wrapped the blanket around my waist, and waited for Dr. Rao to come in.  When he did, he explained what they were going to do, what they had seen on the MRI report (lots of fibroids and an “area of interest”) and told me they were going to do an endometrial biopsy.  And they’d need me to give a urine sample.  o.O

Luckily, I’m still on the lasix, so in about 10 minutes I had to pee again.  Turns out they were doing a pregnancy test.  I’m not.  Duh.  Trust me – spend a month with the virus from hell, and sexin’s is the last thing on your mind.  So, they do the exam, and then proceed to do the biopsy (OUCH X 1,000,000,000) and then they tell me that they’ll have the results back in one week, but he’s 99% certain that I am going to need a hysterectomy.  Well, shit.  More surgery.

So, I go back in one week to find out if this “area of interest” is malignant or not.  And they are probably going to do the hysterectomy even if it is benign because of my wicked family history of cancer.  So, yay.

So, that’s where we are.

At least Dr. Rao is cute.  Of course, cute in the “Wow he looks like he’s 12” cute, and not the George Clooney kind of cute.  Because yeah, no one needs to be all hot and bothered by they gynecological oncologist.


1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. bluzdude
    Jul 26, 2012 @ 23:00:37

    On the bright side, at least you’re blogging again.

    I’ll be keeping my fingers crossed… Well, for a little while, anyway. I gotta stop some time, or else how can I type?


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